depression

this is no joke. trust me. for once i'm serious. the reason im feeling depressed may sound funny to all u guys back home in Malaysia but if u were to be in my shoes, u wont be laughing at all.

i miss Malaysia. no that's not the main point. the main point is that i can stand it anymore eating the food over here. my craving for Malaysian food is way too great. my taste buds recognize nothing but Malaysian food. in order to kill that craving, i've been snacking on a lot of junks here hoping to find that one thing that tastes exactly like Malaysian food. but i found nothing. so i'm surviving on Maggi mee.

it's unhealthy. i've been eating Maggi mee everyday since i found it here. and that was my third week here in NZ. i have it for breakfast and for supper everyday WITHOUT fail! how would u feel abt laughing abt my depression now? imagine all the damage that's been done to my body due to the unhealthy food. it's not pretty.

my depression is killing me. knowing that i'm gonna go home soon but i still have to wait. knowing everyone and everything i love back home is waiting for me but i'm still stuck here. it's sad. it's sickening. it's depressing. it's not funny. i hope my depression doesnt go into a deeper level. i hope i dont get physical and mental breakdowns. i hate it. i want to be back home. i wanna be with all those familiar faces. i wanna be in a place i'm used to.

i'm not saying NZ is a bad place. it's just that i'm not used to this place yet. why it's obvious i'm a Malaysian.